Thanks to 150+. Love the Crabtree & Evelyn stuff u all got me. The Chamomile tea was really unexpected, more so than i appeared to be. I vow not to be lazy and take good care of my skin with all the lotions and stuff i receive. =) Dinner at Spaggs was great. Shall dine there more often. the Bali cafe is real nice place for a drink or two at night, away from the crowd.

Accompanied my sis to the polyclinic in search of immediate help for eye infection. After the consultation, i checked with the doctor (yes, again!) regarding my nose. He told me that it's an allergy and there's no cure for that allergy as of yet. MAYBE i can try taking medicine. ya. like thanks for the info.

The WAT 2008 interview was okay.
ALASKA HERE I COME!
I extended my work time there so hopefully i'll get SEP in a uni which starts the sch term late (later than local uni at least).

Better than the expected from the totally unexpected. Went for some career fair today, and spent an hr walking aimlessly around the booths thinking of what to do if someday i "realize" my dreams aint mine to begin with. I look at a "particular organisation" and thought how good it will be if i can work with ships or oil rigs. From the model, i can imagine myself standing liken to a speck of dust near the lifeboats.

Just picture yourself awestruck at the environment u're working in, with curiosity aplenty about the entire business model the company is built upon, passionate about how an insignificant you can contribute to this mega deal and swelling with pride of being part of the organisation. I dunno much about the industry but i certainly want to experience all that with PSA in mind.

Lesson for the day: Halloween is a boring movie. Horrible. Waste my money. Boo

The big hoo-ha

I'm 21. Maybe i should start acting mature.

I received showers of blessings on the 18th. I mean, it's in a quantity liken to a thunderstorm instead. By this i am referring to the rain and wind.
Drenched, cold and wet. Like any other day in the monsoon season.

Fortunately, i love rainy days. Good mood, great weather, fantastic time.

Thanks to ODIN, i had a great time. and the drizzle came silently after the storm.
I had a wonderful happy dinner with lots of smiles and laughter. Appreciate the effort they put in for the sabo session and gifts. Frankly speaking, the card would have suffice. The best gifts are those that make people smile, remember?


-----------------------------------------------------

Top secrets to staying young:



































Ignore all 3 rules and just follow this one:















This card is perfect, really. ODIN internal joke.
They are simply the sweetest.
and they got me a Mizuno jacket, Godiva chocos and the ultimate- self made ODIN vouchers. laughs... and of course the memorable sabo session.

Joyce the random-qn-generator came up with the most bizarre ultimate crazy questions i would never imagine. So i ended up being blind-folded AND made to eat stuff like pepper, chilli padi, ginger, drinking soy sauce and what not, plus play with camo cream thinking it's mayo etc as punishment..

Some details that i missed out and will remember for quite some time:
Milo is under Nestle.
ODIN lettering order- J,S,A,G
Chalet number C & D
Camp dates 196-226
Joyce had wanton noodles for lunch on the day we break camp
JY ordered sugar cane juice WITH lemon
The 7 names of Bowman juniors- weejin, Diana, Suanggita, Diana, Vanessa, Christian, Wan jou
3 birth dates: YQ/pooh- 15 Nov, Terry- 14 Nov, JY 20 Jan.
The SR we got on the first day of O week for Bowman is SR13. laughs
23 pple in ODIN according to n(shirts)

plus some other super random things that we dont even find it a need to remember. I made some intelligent guesses, and totally screwed up the rest.

and they made me cut the cake using a pair of chopsticks!!!!!!!!!! like dots.. but i guess i must be having too much fun to be bothered. i posed WITH the chopsticks. laughs.. and thank goodness i was smart enuff to not wear makeup.

now i'm looking forward to yet another thing. The WAT 2008 interview later in the afternoon. **Pray silently**

***

***

***

***

***

***

***

May Lady Mother Luck shines on me tomorrow.

I'm counting down to my fourth 18th birthday in less than an hour's time.

This week has been exceptionally smooth sailing. The weather was superb. I booked tix to HK on sat, tues training went well, today's batik cls was great fun, fna tut finished within the hour, and the PSA talk was the highlight. Got to know some new pple, crap with some acquaintances (caught on candid camera. lolx), got lots of help and understanding from the team and enjoyed the bus journey home.


Things usually go uphill when i'm appreciative of what i have and give thanks for everything in the present. so that's like foreign aid from someone above. My backup in times of need. There's always a reason for you to be optimistic. Give thanks. and i don't think YOU need reminder.

After the scrimping and saving comes the spending.

Counting down to yet another trip. With those whom i know will have a great time together no matter where we are. never mind Nepal, New Guinea or Antigua.

Blessed with good health, a loving family and great friends. So maybe that explains why i don't see the need to have more wants, coz the act of asking for more signifies dissatisfaction or the lack of appreciation for the good. and the last thing i want to see happen is for someone up there to take away all that i have now.

Grateful for all the good, the bad and the ugly, plus a million of other things..
Thank you, for my fate of blood-ties. i can never imagine another family that i will be happier in.
Thank you, for the gift of friendships forged from young and hopefully thru adulthood. People whom i will still hope to meet in my next life, and all the other succeeding ones.
Thank you, for all the luck i have received, am receiving and will receive in the lifetime and a million ones thereafter, many which i believe would have changed me in unimaginable ways.
Thank you, for bestowing the ability to have beliefs and faith in so many things. They determine how i turned out to be.

Giving thanks, with a grateful heart.

Bogged down by some stuff that will be insignificant in a year's time, or maybe shorter.

It doesnt make me happy knowing that i am the bottom one third of the module cohort, or rather:

i am pretty upset knowing that i am at the bottom of the pyramid with the other 35% despite assuming that i knew the solutions to half the questions.

yeah. knew the answers. like real.

And there's just this psychological effect that is present when you're being placed alongside many others of the same AND it's pretty obvious that you're clearly not one of the best (in actual fact far from it). I claimed that grades dont really affect me. REALLY. they DONT REALLY affect me but that doesnt mean that the probability is zilch. at least let me be with the majority. I guess with my 30% coursework grade screwed, my end year couldnt be very much better.

No wonder the big-hooha regarding the PSLE mathematics paper that parents have been complaining/commenting for everyday of the past week. I think i can sort of understand why those kids will cope themselves up in their rooms, cry, or get emotionally agitated etc.. just because they got a crappy tough paper. When you know that usually u're pretty good, ur ego and confidence brings you to a point where you know that you want to and can stay somewhere above mid-range. Then someone gave a shove and suddenly you find that all you can see is the dirt on the floor. and that it takes that little effort to break you. That's when you start having doubts of your ability, your confidence and later almost everything else. the negatives thoughts start invading your mind and before you know it, they are unstoppable. then they take over every inch of your mind and start eating into your ego and id.

Okay. i am exaggerating. But that still doesnt take away my discontentment. annoyed at my immaturity,especially with that irritating voice gnawing at my thoughts and a voice in my head nagging of the ought-tos i need to be responsible for now. those bugging stuffs that are on vacation from somewhere else.

My friends were saying how the educational system has evolved since our time (like i'm some obasan). They cant use RED pen coz the colour has some negative psychological impact on children's growth. They cant cross, circle and write BIG FAT ZEROS like our teachers used to coz those too, affect the learning and growth processes and what not. I mean, if i receive a work graded in BLUE pen and no crosses, just nice neat underlines on those wrong stuffs, then i'll ASSUME that it isnt too bad in the first place, since i dont see any crosses and circles. If those things doesnt signify the degree of mistake i made and should amend, i dunno what else does.

Nothing much to look forward to. or rather no expectation.

in front of the invisible line that separates 20 and 21, knowing that there's noway i can hesitate but to step across.

I know there's a million other pple out there who has been kind enough to advise me to hold an extravagant party, minus the E part. For memory sake or what-so-ever i have no idea, but i think their view on this is that it's a milestone, an age-related one.

but since i guess i am as old as i think i am, it doesnt seem to matter, at least for now.

Maybe i'll look back and regret my decision(s) now, but one thing i am certain of- i believe my future self will be able to handle the post-effects, come what may.

The rainy season is here!

I swear my eyelids grew an additional cm recently.
Have been fighting to keep my eyes open for days on end. Takes twice the effort and yield less than a quarter of the desired effect.

Boo. I dislike fastest fingers first. I was THERE before time yet didnt manage to get even one pathetic slot. Boo. Got my hopes too high..

I need an outlet less the option of sleeping so i guess i'll be enjoying training tomorrow, after the CA nightmare.

It doesnt take much for me to realise i'm right in my decision to go for something of my interest instead of vying for better performance in you-know-that's-where-all-the-money-is.

Just 2 lectures into the module, i know i'm not cut out for it. Halfway into the semester, i find myself thinking i know some stuff yet am still as confused as ever over most. those negative vibes come strongest during tutorials, when MODEL answers are right in front of your face. No matter how i see it, there's always a huge gap between knowing what you should do and actually applying the right formula to obtain the correct solutions, and it doesnt console me that i have good know ledge about the former and a hate-hate relationship with the latter.

Sometimes i wonder why some tutors still treat us like kids.

I can't fathom the need to ask for details and reasons due to a one-time change for a class.

Maybe to them we're still stuck at age 15, unable to make good judgments.

Maybe we should highlight to them that we're no longer in high school.

Maybe i should just use 'personal issues' as an excuse.
Then again, i dont want to explain myself during the next meeting.

But doesnt it makes sense that i have something more important than a tutorial class so much so that i bother to email and inform instead of just pon-ing? Is there a need to go down to checking validity of reason just because i need to change a class. Seriously, tertiary education doesnt make much of a difference to pre-tertiary ed..

So i wonder when they're start respecting us and allow us the right to keep mum regarding stuff that we simply dont find a need to announce.

~Come away with me~

Come away with me.

Got to know a couple of acquaintances whom reinforced my wants.
This time round i am trying real hard to make it on my own, if you can see.
It's always good to have company but when time comes for the unavoidable to happen, i guess we too, can manage it alone. (Remember it is always enough to be taken care of by myself)

Seriously, dreams are pretty much redundant if you can already foresee what you will become in 10, or 20 years time, give or take a couple of scenarios. We will all graduate from youth, get stuck in the rat race of humanity till the society gives you a break (prolly 5 years before you close your eyes for the final time) while in the meantime holding on tightly to the illusions we conjure up of the prettier tomorrows. For some, they climb up the right ladder to success which guarantees them a one-way ticket to the pot of gold at the other end of the rainbow while others climb up other ladders all the same BUT end sliding down the snake's tail to the bottom and have to make do with whatever else.

Seriously, i dont want to live to 30 and start looking back and regretting what have i NOT done the things i wanted to do when i can. I want to step out to the working world in future knowing that i've tried my very best. I want to be able to share my experiences with others if possible, inspiring them to do what they want if it's within their means. A degree CAN BE a passport to a great career. But attitude takes you to the top. I don't want to recall my education as a series of mugging feat after another, attempting to break my previous semester GPA with more As and lesser Bs and Cs. I want to be able to reminisce about a million other things like Reaction, FOP activities, sports, recre stuff, competitions, carnivals, seminars, slacking in the library beside a bunch of people who were mugging, getting chided by the fierce and unfriendly lab tech, and mugging of course, beside many others like SEP, WAT,hall etc..

Humans do change you know. To an unimaginable extent. Maybe it's all inborn but a tap on the right nock sets you going. The world is as big as you think it is.

Happy 18th Birthday Gek!

Though i'm more fortunate in the sense that i got to celebrate my 18th bdae on board superstar Virgo with hundreds of others in the middle of nowhere, you get to do it at where i think is the place closest to heart- home..

That brought back memories of the day when i fully apprehend the meaning behind the phrase 'The Earth is round.' Missed the boundless sight in front of your very eyes that seemingly extends into infinity... Almost forgotten how it is to feel the kind of emotions that make me willing and contented to just die in the middle of nowhere. Missed the only place where no matter which direction i am facing, i can see the magical moments where heaven and sea joined ad infinitum.. It's the kinda setting you'll never get in Singapore. Then again, there's pretty much nothing much we get from Singapore less some million ongoing experiments and projects..

So:
Can i request for a trip to Barcelona, Spain for my 21st birthday?

To hell with rules and schedules. How i wish i could dump my planner!

Things aint really going to what i PLANNED. and i'm on the verge of pulling out my hair, burning up my notes- all on the first day of term break. Like thanks.

I have yet to start on SCM, presentation & work due 1st day after the break. Have yet to revise for BI, test on tues. GEK1507 discussion on tues and i barely have an idea what the whole module is about, lest the proj discussion. Fri will be a day of hell, as usual, with FNA presentation (ya, haven do i know). Sat is the mid-term exam! and guess what, i have alr started, AS IF. what a surprise.

okay. cheers to a good term week for slacker J. Shall go oil my gears to prepare for engine start.

TGIF.

Kalau anda bertanya apa kabar saya, saya akan membelas baik-baik saja.

Term break is finally here. But that doesn't signifies the need to call for a celebration karena saya harus pergi ke sekolas. sianz.

My friend was asking "anda besok akhir minggu ada acara apa?" and the first thing that ran through my mind was:

"Saya mau tidur.." then i added "sampai siang atau sore." Dia juga mau tidur. lolx..

Teman kuliah berkata "mau membuat PR." I almost fainted. No wonder Bu Indri was saying orangnya mahasiswa ada baik. ya betul. saya menggendangi dengan ibu. tetapi saya kurang baik. maaf, ada tidak baik.

Besok malam saya punya pesta ulang tahun di warung, di dekat taman dan rumah. haizz. ulang tahun saya tanggal delapan puluh Oktober. cepat-cepat. -_-

Aiyo. Sekarang jam empat kurang dua puluh - terlambat!! Saya pergi ke tidur sekarang. Sampai betemu orang!!

As far as i know, ball games are just not my type of sports. I don't see the point of serving to get the ball away from you, or trying hard to get the ball so as to get it away from you..

The heavenly acute neck strain you get the following day after shooting hoops or looking at the sky for too long makes me wonder how some can do it daily without complain and still doesn't look as if their necks are hinged.

Not to mention the possible backache and knee injuries you might get from constance bending to pick up balls or lunching to retrieve them.. Oh, and don't forget the risk of getting hit on the head, in the face, or any part of your body for that matter..

Despite my reservations on ball games (see above), i think i am beginning to like netball. The ballgame that seems so difficult to get a nice shot through and the game in which the courts are almost always empty.

Helping hands, touching lives is back!

HELPING HANDS, TOUCHING LIVES fund from Singtel is back!! The fourth year running?! and hopefully for ever..

Cut out the page from Today newspapers (from last week) to fold into hearts and drop the hearts off at any post boxes. Singtel will donate $1 for every heart collected. Thanks~

A happy addition to the hanger in my room. The medal with a lionhead in the middle is the evidence of ytd's netball sports carnival victory. like yeah!

PLAYER

Sports carnival in school today. I made an effort to go down earlier for gym before heading to the courts..

As usual, ODIN outperformed others in netball.. But YQ got injured.. i am terrified of old injuries, not that i have any.. but it's a fact that once u sprained/ hurt any joints, a second time is pretty much guaranteed.. and i dont think my tolerance level suffice for repeated injuries.. lolx..

Been ages since i last exercise... Makes the waking up early on a Saturday turmoil worthwhile..

Blind spots

We do not know certain things about ourselves because God wants us to truly be ourselves around others. That is why others know a part of us that we don't even know exist

Somebody must have moved that finish line

[Somebody must have moved that finish line]

I like this one liner. I like how it expresses exasperation and helplessness.

Mindful that even when you crossed the line, there is always another line somewhere else.

There is no way you'll know whether you reached it finally simply because there is no end to a line, unless you stop drawing...

"Please don't get offended. When i first saw you, i thought you are from Engine."

I swear i could have died laughing.

Omong-omong dengan teman.
i totally agree. I don't look like i'm from biz..

My bro was asking why i dress like i do for school and he too commented tat i look like i'm from Engine. Like what he said, 'business girls dress up for school.' and putting on makeup is 'normal.' So sorry to say, i belong to the minority.

'Not that it is bad. just different.' and i take that as a compliment.
So sorry for not having good dress sense and not taking the trouble to sacrifice sleep for beauty (no pun intended). lolx.

My favourite season is here. the RAINY season. Seriously, i enjoy the weather so much that i didnt sleep throughout the journey to school, just so i can feel the wind in my face and keep that uplifted mood on a high.

Sometimes, i myself think that i'm a little loony. Then again, the article on RealAge did advise us to focus on the little things in life that make you smile because focusing on your happiness will protect your emotional well-being and physical health. Like wow. lolx

DREAMER~

My current list of wants..
1) Master Bahasa Indonesia for simple communication
2) Get into hall next semester
3) Apply for SEP for senior year sem 1
4) Apply for work & travel in USA for the holiday before acad yr 08/09
5) Cambodia heartbeat or maybe Myanmar prog
6) Enjoy all my DSC modules
7) CCA

Let's just say it's always good to think far and dream a LITTLE..

Sliding... drifting, drifting..

Rainy season. Love YET hate it. I guess Christmas will come 3 months earlier this year coz of the increase number of Rudolphs around.. and i'm indifferent to the medicine. like what's new and what helps?

School has been far from perfect less my 3D timetable, but since when is anything ever close to that? Still in lala land waiting for someone to give me a wake up call while the others are already on their toes..

Someone hand me a log. i need two hard knocks and a float.

BUT besides that, the most crucial thing i require is a sign- a neon one.. Or maybe a shrinking glass instead to make me NOT notice the smaller pictures and start to FOCUS on the overall..

QY's bdae

QY's bdae celebration at New Park Hotel. Hope you like the prezzie.. This is the first bdae celebration that BL missed. The food was good and the ambiance great. Needless to say, the company was fantastic.

It's a pity i didnt take enough pics though.
and F4-1 means that we didnt do any SHE songs during the KTV session.. like haizz.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Didnt receive the email that i was waiting for. The confirmation email for waitlist accommodation. so there goes my chance of staying in hall this semester. =(
better luck next sem i guess.

ACM =(
QY's Bdae =)

Read this cute metaphor:
the 5 balls in life- work, family, health, friends and spirit.
Imagine juggling all 5 balls in the air.
You'll soon realise that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back.
But the other 4 balls are made of glass. Once drop, they will never be the same again.
so this logic we must understand, and strive for balance in life.


no wonder.. work should always take a backseat in life.

Tian Yu Happy Birthday Odin was what was written on that piece of white chocolate. and the wait staff is really kuku to bring out the plates BEFORE we managed to surprise her with the cake. Like THANKS. A nice gathering nonetheless. oh.. and just picture elmo and lion together.

Haven been sleeping well lately. I wonder if it's my nose (again) or the fact that my bed is facing a half-bodied mirror (esp this month). Or maybe it's just the symptoms of school-related anxiety, which is literally zero as i AM enjoying school thoroughly. Have this on off headache, particularly in the late afternoon.. I think i need aspirin.. or maybe just lots of water and honey to prevent dehydration..

Am so keen to sign up for the Cambodia heartbeat and my enthusiasm level seems to hype up as the deadline draws nearer.. Maybe my holiday is meant for greater things.. stuff that i should do for the greater good of mankind. lolx.. and it is certainly heartening to feel good about doing good. doubles the joy..

and I think i'm missing something pretty big in my life.

No cure for nonexistent problem

The doc told me that it aint a problem, so there's no cure.

That means i'll just have to live with that nonexistent problem for the rest of my life, unless i manage to convince myself that it isnt even a problem in the first place. and how am i supposed to do so given that everyone who knows it thinks it IS a problem.

the funniest thing is that i was told to avoid dusty places. AND as if that needs reminder. like thanks.

I would really love to be more independent.

Let's just say practice makes perfect so I'll just have to start from the ordinary things to get lots of opportunities.

Was in semi-formal attire today. Formal wear is never the same again after going through HM training. Everything doesn't seem right that way.

Footwear- no open toes heels
Simple accessories- Ear studs, no dangling. Definitely no blings
Long sleeved shirt that is like .75 inches out of the blazer?
Striped shirt with solid color suit, never striped for both.
Shirt tucked nicely
Bun up hair
Make up
Professional looking suitcase
Proper posture
Manicured fingernails
A nice smile and lots of
Confidence.

I like it that they're applying what they learnt during etiquette classes. and was kinda shocked that they really did pace their eating speed with the rest of the group so that we can finish our food together. That's very considerate and sensitive, especially the guys and those fast eaters.. and before i forget, HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY SU KEE, the Odin lion!!

All we need is a leap of faith. Leave the rest to luck.

Had a long nice chat with my Dad about his job. Make that a first, and hopefully not the last. I enjoy listening to what he has to say about happenings in his life.. and glad that he is willing to share.. Seems like once your children has grown to an age old enough to include them in your all-so-mighty adult world, understanding what you're saying & feeling and able to provide feedback, then you're really near to reaching or overcoming mid-life crisis..

Maslow is right about putting that at the tip of his hierarchy. Once you get past a certain level, nice-sounding names dont really matter.

and being a parent is tough. being the sole breadwinner of a big family with all your children still schooling and the mortgage loan not fully repaid is even tougher.

so i want to tell my dad:
sometimes all we need is a leap of faith, and leave everything else to luck.

There's a hole in my sidewalk by Portia Nelson

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost, I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn't my fault.
It still takes along time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in.
It is a habit but my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street.

----------------------------------------------

I don't know what i want sometimes.
But i know that i want to know what i want.
I know that once i know what i want,
i will be able to get it.
Of course, i may not want what i get when i get it..
But at least i'll know i don't want that!
Then i can move on to something else i don't know if i want..

Ah.. THAT'S PROGRESS..

"Sometimes you just have to take the leap, and build your wings on the way down." -Kobi Yamada

School has officially started and i'm on a roll..

my senior (lolx.. finally a friend older than me in terms of age and educational level!) acknowledged my presence in my GEM lecture. like WOW.. usually pple try to ignore tut mates whom you aint very much acquainted with, especially after like one day of tutorial..

Had my fav New Zealand Ice-cream, which was enough to make my day, followed by some retail therapy.. or rather, shopping indulgence. i'd never have believed myself.. blew an entire week's allowance on some stuff that i guess i wont have much chance of using.. but i am happy.. lolx. so that makes all the difference..

I'm so looking forward to INDO class can.. but i know next to naught.. so let's just hope my 5 hours of tutorial each week helps.. before u know it, i'll be able to converse with my uncle's maid (yeah. like real)..

i'll be helping PL on that SDU thingy that the club came up with. so exciting.. and i'm tempted to go for the HK 3-D trekking trip (if only it isnt so ex.. over $1000 for 3 days!! and i'm broke now.. -_-"') and the Cambodia volunteer program (but we're planning a 2 weeks trip to China in Dec so too bad).. it's like when u have the right attitude and mind, everything just seems to start flowing.. i've never really taken note of stuff like these before.. now it just seems like 24 hours a day aint enough for me.. and that there are simply too many school activities to take part in, too many things to try before time runs out.. am now regretting not trying the CASE competition with Angela.. if not i'll alr be working on a proj before the assignments kick in..

yeah. and GREEN is my favourit-est color now.. lolx..

Phew~ sigh of relief..

I FINALLY cleared my poly CPF tuition loan..

Peeps, my bank acc is officially at rock bottom so please exclude me from luxurious makan fares and such till i find a way to tap into a flow of Yusof Ishak..

Dun ask me how i did it coz i am amazed at myself too.. lolx.. Didnt i say i am an old age Asian who is uncomfortable with debts?

gearing up for school.. I'm so looking forward to the various modules, given that i like half of what i am going to take.. i am confident, so totally unexpected, that i will do what it takes to ensure i have a great semester. but let's just hope my enthusiasm doesnt fluctuates..

I've encountered surprises aplenty this holiday. Just like what i prayed for during my examinations, i really did have a fulfilling and meaningful break. and it is by far the best to date. What would i lose if i cross my line? there's always another line somewhere. I've taken so many risks this time round and realised that it is not at all bad.. the one who risk nothing, has nothing and is nothing.

and i have a feeling the best has yet to come.. let's just hope i'm able to keep my optimism level high enough so that when it dips, i'm still at the average.. dont they use to say that you have to aim for the moon to land amongst the stars?

I think i really have myself to thank. i didnt realise anything more than what i already know. NO. but i was standing on the ledge and decided to leap.

Like thanks.

Art of rejecting flaggers

The annual Flag day was a success. at least to my OG. being in AMK from 0630 till 2100 aint an easy feat. and the fact that i thoroughly enjoyed myself made flag a really meaningful event. People donated generously. My max was 10 bucks and i had a good many $2, given the charity situation recently, i thought we did great.

I had a few good laughs about the way people reject or try to siam flaggers. I told this auntie "Notes are accepted and greatly appreciated" when she told me that "I dont have coins." she stared at me for quite sometime k.. and hasten off looking damn embarrassed. some nice people saw me at 8pm still flagging and donated additional coz according to them, i was hardworking.. Was chatting with some old friends, schoolmates and alumni, some of them graduated years back and some recently. Some fellow schoolmate was saying "see u ard" when i dont even know the faculty. some other was cracking jokes with me under the hot sun.. Another senior was telling me he has been looking out for Bizaders since morning and only managed to see ONE, which is me. lolx.. another came over and talked to me while waiting for his transport. everyone is excited about flag and confident that we're going to win this year (again). yeah. i'm confident of that too. given our enthu level. sure win.

------==================------------------======================------------

Went Marina Bay for NDP 2007 with Ching ytd..
THANKS FOR THE TIX GIRL! AND HELP ME SAY THANKS TO GX TOO!

NDP rox can. I missed singing to the national day songs loud and in high spirits.. I love to see a sea of red and everyone (almost) gathered at a common place and knowing practically all the songs be it chinese, english, malay or tamil. Love having the renamed Kallang-Marina wave. the goody bag, the fireworks, the effects and such.. i love the moment(s) where i feel that i belong, truly.

The 3D defence thingy felt like what someone planned to show to the rest how much s spent on the NECESSITIES and some great reasons for doing so.. I cant deny they werent of some top notch equip. and the air thingy saluting is kinda cool.. the thing tt looks much like a hovercraft got me quite interested but other better things caught my attention..

The over friendly uncles sitting beside Ching was a little too enthu.. and i received smses from friends asking if i went for the NDP @ Marinabay yesterday.. lolx..

--------================---------------=======================

Thanks to Winnie for inviting us over to ur place.. Guess we made a mess AND helluva noise.. I love her massage chair and garden swing, not to forget her Pooh bear filled belongings and room.. Citadels is fun IF i dun get killed or robbed so often. and i am absolutely jealous of her OPEL automobile can. I was gazing at the car at the MRT station while waiting for her to come fetch me and didnt notice that that car was hers. Like OMG lor.. So jealous.. Grr...

We stayed up the entire night playing games.. and they never fail to amaze me with their super ability of staying up the entire night one day after FLAG plus continuing games all the way till the following day's afternoon. like WOw.. i cant even deny that i'm old.. or convince myself to believe that i'm as young as them.. cant take all that late nights and alcohol and intellectual games in the middle of the night when ur brain is supposed to be at it's most lax stage..

I'm glad i took the initiative. Never look back since..

On to only 4 modules this semester. Only 4 modules and i bidded for Bahasa Indonesian!!!!!! i'm so looking forward to sprouting Indo can.. lolx.. so i can pass off as malay if need be.. wahaa

I was asked if I am a BBA senior, year 3.

I have no idea if I should be elated or sad. Like what they say, I have the disposition of a year 3 student. Then again, I'm afraid they missed out the other side of me.

Serious sleeping disorder. Guess i have to start monitoring my condition.. They have been asking when i can stop sleeping at every possible moment. and i wonder just when they can stop trying to video me sleeping and treat that as entertainment. laughs.. i guess if i were them, i would've done the same thing and laugh at myself while watching someone being video-ed sleeping..

Let's pray that i get my modules this bidding round. I've never gotten to bidding at round 2A with only 3 confirmed modules (and i JUST DROP ONE!!) Should i just say that i am optimistic? or maybe i'm just too tired to be bothered.

Flag tomorrow. Look out for pple in PINK and red bands.. Please do your part for charity.. dont attempt to siam.

Ouch

Home sweet home.

Scorched by the blazing sun. I've morphed from the color of a cooked prawn to that of a live soft shell crab. My mom saw me and asked what happened to my chao ta skin. yup. as if i need to do any explanation.

Didn't really participate in the games save for the finale. The OCH trip blew as the MCs seemed really reluctant for us to go AFTER we waited for 4 hours. The self-entertainment sessions were great though, and thanks to Kim for the nice hospitality at KEVII..

The juniors were great. i wish i were in their corhot.. not that i am complaining, but so far i only have one module which i am taking with familiar pple. think i will be polishing my independence skills further this semester. yeap. as if i needed more of that.

Family gathering this week. FINALLY.
Grandma got to be chauffeured by me,
grandpa still cant get over the K episode,
i got my dad irritated by my reckless driving skills,
and i am happier just being present today..

To more rest and relaxation before the sch term.
Cheers, to a better tomorrow.

The time has come for us to part. All the best Nino. We'll miss you.
Take good care of yourself in China and hope to see you back real soon. Gain lots of experience and remember we're just a phone call away..

Apologies for not being able to send you off at the airport and i believe that the girls cried buckets.. We'll always be here when u need us and let things start anew. Dont start doing those stuff that you told us during Cat's bdae. Hope to see a happier you next year. Please rem to give us ur china number in case we need to contact u..

The sleepover last night felt just like any other sleepovers we have had. Nothing really special and it seems that all it matters for us is to enjoy each other's company for the very last time at the 'old' house. I'm glad we took time for steamboat, ktv, sleepover, shopping, dinner and our very first da-ing session with the 4 of us present.

Hope you like the gift as much as we did selecting it. before i forget, thanks pal, for everything.. together with the 2 of them, you all are the reason why I never regret not quiting SJAB in Sec 2.

Once again, all the best. Let us know when you've settled down and see if we can make plans to meet u in Dec.. hopefully *pray hard...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Been fighting sleep for days on end but realized that the human will is incredible at times..

Came back from night cycling on Monday and totally forgotten about bidding deadline on Tues.. Missed everything for round 1A. Had a training session with barely enough sleep followed by the sleepover gathering at THE 'hougang house'. dozed off and managed to sleep for an hour before waking up and saying my goodbyes.. i took a long slow walk home and went back to bed for another hour's of sleep before the ODIN peeps came to pick me up to school. I dozed off at every possible freetime. No wonder they say that if we have a competition to see who can sleep the longest, i'll be the winner.

O week officially starts tomorrow. From tml onwards, i'll be stuck in school till my next holiday. Say cheers to a new school term.

zombie with failed eye-makeup

Thanks to all my friends who didn't tell me that i look like a walking zombie with horrible gothic eye makeup that smudged. I appreciate your kind intentions.

Life has been beautiful recently and I hope it stays this way.

I didn't know I can be dead tired yet happy, contented and grateful at the same time.
It never occurred to me that I can be the person I always wanted to be. Let's just say I'm pretty much amazed at myself, by myself and with myself.

Been acting like a workaholic desperately clocking OTs when i actually don't really need them. Making myself tired, but contented. It's as if I am making progress doing what i can with all i have. I mean, everyone loves to see a little more of Yusof Ishak.. Who doesn't? Even if it means sacrificing some beauty sleep and suffering from the effects of dark circles and eyebags..

WQ's interpretation is right. and the number 8 is the sign of infinity.

Met up with Jo and Tina today at our fav makan place. I like the kind of feeling of seeing each other and knowing that we're still the same persons, but better. Sharing the going-ons and knowing that we're all good and happy, albeit tired. Finally gotten the Taipei picture book. Love the fact that we share a common experience and that no matter how long time passes, we can bring up the same thing and recap the experiences once again.

The only issue i have now is that i've been missing the weekly gatherings for two consecutive weeks.. Haven been spending enough time with my family. Can't remember the last time i ate dinner at home with my mom and sis. Think May. So please just imagine how much i am looking forward to a good home cooked meal served piping hot straight from the pan. That is sheer indulgence in comparison to cafeteria food. Her cooking beats that of a 5* hotel's fare. Really. To me.

I'm so looking forward to work tomorrow.

The sunnier Sunday is, the better Monday will be.

Just one of the rare family gatherings which we talk about whom we'll never forget.

No issues about who they were, but rather what they liked, how we felt and the going ons then..

Reminisces... Been so fast yeah.. almost a year.. since i sat alone in SW2104 lecture listening to the crap about growing old and dying when someone close really did passed on..

My maternal Grandpa knew what happened two week ago.. the incident blew out of proportion and he apologised. that was an unforgettable episode and credits go to my Grandma..

He seems to enjoy the ride home everytime i drive.. saying good good good~
I enjoy it too.. knowing that things can happen anytime.. tonight he was saying that he got just a couple of years more to live.. and that 80 is enough for him.. saying that he has no wish to live to 90 at all.. i dont like it when the old speculate just how long more they WANT to live; it's like predetermining your will to go on.. everyone, especially him.

Tomorrow is Youth Day. as if it makes any difference to me. i have to work. oh crap. and i'm a youth who's not entitled to youth day. and cheers, to MORE OT tomorrow. yeah right.

This is turning into a dumping ground for crap. serious.

I'm making improvement. Work is getting worse at a slower rate.

Some guest named K C made my day today, with a one-liner in his email correspondence..
Something to do with GEM.. I feel so proud of myself.. *yaya.. buay paiseh ar***

Wanted to ask the almighty Lee whether i can wear jeans to work since i am allowed (by left) to wear casual attire - skirts. By right i was supposed to don office attire for all 6 days. but dressing up and looking like a 25-yo aint really what i look forward to.. but i know his answer anyway. He likes his female subordinates looking like OLs.. with knee length skirt, court shoes, nice blouse, blazer and makeup. damn.

Meeting with the Odin peeps always makes me feel youthful again. Wasnt in the right capacity to learn and play new games. My mind is fried and everything is playing on slow-mo beside me. Work has been this dreary monotonous series of actions that i perform for the sake of the payslip at the end of the month. and now that it's the start of the month again, i shall wait for the end of the month to come.

Was in a crazy mood the other day so i ended up with a bagful of Crabtree & Evelyn stuff AND a big hole in my pockets.. Thanks Tina, for the trouble of meeting me and passing me the mailing thing..

The emails are getting on my nerves lately.. when you're a few emails away from 700 and spent most of your waking hours trapped in the office facing the com and corresponding with people you'd rather not be in contact for the rest of your life, you'll feel like doing something out of the ordinary. something outrageous. serious. my mngr was saying we should just tug at the plug so the com wont work.. my colleague was saying we should just spend 5 minutes with our index finger on the 'Delete' key. i think we should just pack up and go home for a good rest.

i go to work daily bright and sunny and return home long after the sun sets. it's crazy, but i felt as if i've sold my soul for cash.

The funniest thing is, i received a super belated Xmas gift. i was sort of given the gift 6 months back but it came recently.. i guess that IS my birthday prezzie too.. whatever it is, i'm grateful, for being given the trust and freedom.. thanks Dad! you're the best!

I've forgotten how fun it is to say what i want, do what i like, be who i am.

Thanks to everyone in ODIN. I'm grateful for the chance to relive what i've missed out as a freshie last year..

Back from Kukup. It's a lovely backward place.. totally what i imagined the 1960s to be.. Exactly how i think my parents lived when they were young..

They have a population of approx 1000 and you cant see any young women there.. we were joking that my cousin, my sis and i were the oldest single women in the entire kukup.

houses above water.. the place is without a spec of dust. serious. i walked about the entire day and find my feet still clean.. and i still cant get past using the toilet where everything goes straight into the mud below. i prefer modern facilities where i dont see where those stuff go.. lolx..

the seafood there is fresh. superb.

ate sea mantis.. for goodness sake, i didnt even know it exists.. and it tastes much like crab meat..

i made a new friend there.. a cute little boy we called didi and ltr on xiao jun.. lolx..

the kids!







-----------------------------------------------
i am a mahjong idiot.. i know nuts about the rules.. but i guess it's beginner's luck.. i won 5 times in a row.. that's when my little cousin, another super noobz came and break my luck.. and for that round, the first few tiles we discarded were all 'super tiles'..

----------------------------------------------------
that's a harry potter lightning shot.
----------------------------------------------------

reliving the childhood experiences.. blowing bubbles, running about the place, playing together..

-----------------------------------------------------



beautiful lilies with the dirty mud and unwanted fishing nets behind..

---------------------------------------------------

failed magic.. lolx..

----------------------------------------------------

this is how the entire village looks like at 9,10 pm.. the night is still young but the pple are all sound asleep.. they have to wake up at 4 to fish..

-----------------------------------------------------

money eating chips.. cool~ u shld see them read the papers.. lolx.. like some pro..

----------------------------------------------------


toilet left to rot...

---------------------------------------------------

ahem~ i can ride u know..

---------------------------------------------------

the place is comfortable.. it felt like a visit to my grandparent's place.. sleep well, eat well and slack well. what more can i ask for?
love walking about the place under the sun amazed at stuff that the locals cant even be bothered about. things like the monkeys, rats, mudskippers, crabs, ongoing renovations, TOILETS, bicycles, rubbish etc... yes, even rubbish!

we were shocked, when the lady threw the entire POT of steamboat soup over the foyer latch onto the mud below, it doesnt matter coz the tide is coming in.. we stopped doing what we were doing at that point in time, until my cousin commented that the poor mudskipper living just below where the lady emptied the soup is pronounced dead.

and my lovely cuzzies.. the things they say... made my trip a memorable one. and i left that place with a different kind of mood than i expected.. woke up at 0630 this morning and sat outside the house with a cup of milo, enjoying the rain and wind, looking at the pple getting about their daily activities. no worries, no stress.

life really should be like that.

That's from Jo's photobook of our trip to Taipei. yup. that was exactly how we felt that night..

life should be like that.

i missed the trip. i missed OTOT R&R activities.. i missed chatting with friends about the insignificant and/or the important things in life..


was chatting with another temp staff and she was telling me about her not able to understand why her friend suffers from bruises on her left arm after joining archery.. i was thinking.. oh my god.. that sounds familiar lor.. and i missed shooting.. serious. camp is coming.. but before that i'll be back from kukup.. just one last day to a break from the 600 emails i face daily.

Wedding aftermath

First wedding invitation to a friend's wedding in my near-21 years of youth.
Congratulations to Candy and MF.. and many thanks for inviting..

The dinner was held at ACT 1, the ballroom i like the most in the whole of Mandarin.
It was a cheery but quiet affair. There wasn't much yum-senging and no yelling crying kids running about the place. Their friends were surprisingly well-mannered- for a wedding. No one had glasses after glasses of alcohol, maybe except my table. Suz was a drinker. serious. i lost count of the number of glasses of beer AND red wine she drank.

I love weddings.. this happy occasion where people get together with well-wishes for the couple who has already vow to stay together for good and for bad..

Had a little too much to drink.. went home on a high, only to find that my queen-sized bed has shrunk. reduced to this pathetic single bed. my room is roomier now, if that's what you want to hear. and under the effects of alcohol, my sleep wasn't disturbed lest some back ache and neck ache this morning. I've gotten used to sleeping on big bed for years.. now that i am reverting to a single bed, i wonder just how long it will take me to get used to the limited space again. Seems like we are always resistant to change, especially if everything has been fine and smooth all along..

and that little boy was so cute last night.. he came over to me before he left to give me a hug.. and they were saying he will grow up to be someone females must be wary of.. lolx.. maybe. but as of now, he's cute.

my dad came to fetch me last night.. and my mom asked if i want to drive.. i felt like, but you'll never know what will happen IF i did that.. i felt fine, but my reaction time was slow. so slow reflex on a wols person like me is exactly what a to-be-accident lacks..

Meeting up with the poly peeps tonight.. will definitely have a good time. to ensure my work and social life is balanced.

half the day to myself

spent half the day in the office and the rest of the day away from the com, endless phone calls, yelling irritating corporate clients, boss, and the organization.
not racing against time, but rather flowing with it.. haven had such luxury time since i started work.. and the fact that i'm contented with this short break makes me wonder if i am really pushing myself too hard..

for an 'ultimate slacker' like me, as quoted from jess; this amount of work is ideal to change my over-indulgence lifestyle.. and this change brings about vitamin M, which is exactly what everyone needs..

made some new friends at work, which makes me very happy.. being able to get along with people whom you face 6 days a week, 8 hours a day, is extremely important to my well-being.. coz i see them more often than i do my family.. and dont we all love the feeling of working together towards a common goal??

the same hate hate relationships we have with:
1) our boss, the almighty Lee
2) the other departments which are obsessed with the new art of Taichi
3) those bugger agents
4) the i-am-your-corporate-client-you-owe-me-a-living kinda pple
5) i-dunno-anything-can-your-department-help OTHER department pple
6) one of the 3 out of the 10 who is yet to be diagnosed to be suffering from mental illness according to statistics
7) the canteen auntie/ new cook/ new-and-old dishes

and before i forget,
8) the aircon which is forever PMS-ing.. even after a repair..

-------------------------------------------------

and my manager FINALLY notices how much some other pet is slacking.. for the same amount of time, i am doing stuff 5 times faster, or more. and why is that so, coz i dont listen to mp3 while working, i dont go on endless smoking and toilet breaks, i dont turn up at work late and stretch my lunch hour.. i am sure every penny i earn is well deserved. i dont want others to label me like they do my other course mates.. so i am standing by my beliefs, doing what i know best.

and that's more than enough, for me.

I've sold my soul to the organisation, if you haven realize it.

I'm trying hard to clock in OTs so that i can clear my poly tuition fees by the end of this vacation. This means emptying my savings and not splurging on stuff this season. If i can repay whatever i owe by this year, i know that I'll have time-buffer for my uni tuition fees and the next couple of years will be smoother and easier.

Colleagues are starting to question why I'm working when i should be outside partying and having the time of my life. They say that office job and OTs are for people with no life, for boring people. yeap. i do agree. and i belong to that group. seriously, i cant take all the put-things-off-wait-till-tomorrow attitude when stuff concerns money. I cant seem to understand why people can buy on credit, then let the interests roll.. I am the old age Asian. I am uncomfortable with debts.


Overhead the DJ discussing on the family topic on the morning show.

When is the last time you had a meal with your family or relatives?

I'm glad my answer is at least weekly.. and i'm kinda surprised some pple never communicate with their parents or siblings. i mean, if you dont talk and trust your family totally, who should you turn to? i find it comfortable chatting with my mom at home over dinner, or when she is getting about the household chores. she knows what i'm doing outside and i know exactly how she feels about what i think or do. it's a 2-way thing. and i like this feeling if bonding.. and when there is trust and absolute faith, i get lots of freedom, and i really mean it.

the strength of a chain is at its weakest link and we work hard to increase the tenacity of each link.

Have half a day to myself tomorrow. will make the best of it.

Ashamed at my ignorance and quick-to-judge personality.

Have always thought that she is this havoc, crazy but independent mom who brings up her two sons single-handedly; assuming that she filed for divorce with her husband long ago. Over lunch today, i listened to her conversation in awed. Her husband is in Changi serving time and due out only in 2010. She feels that it's unfair for her kids not to have a Dad when they're at this critical age of 3 and 5 when your friends from school boast about 'papa and mama'.. she wonders what her kids will do when the teacher asks them to draw a family tree. She doesn't want them to grow up deprived of fatherly love. Quietly, i took in all these and the accounts of what happened back then.. Seriously, it didn't occur to me that those police police crime watch shows on TV can happen to someone so close to me. someone i know. someone whom i assume is taking life a little too easy. and that someone is only a couple of years my senior.

'I have to be strong. Life has to go on.' was what she said. Before i can digest all that info and brace myself up to say some encouraging words, she has already smiled and moved on.. Getting by the to-dos in work and life.. It's as good like that, what i wanted to say means nothing anyway. it's those weightless redundant stuff that pple say for the sake of saying..

Hidden behind this facade for all to see and unknowingly turning into what you weren't in the first place..

Find myself more matured when I'm working... school somehow brings me back to a youthful and rebellious stage when I am the center of my world. work life makes me see the big-ger picture..

Work life has been surprisingly smooth for me lest for some minor glitches and the fact that I'm working in the same place, doing the same things but under a different department that still liaise closely with the old department with a new management heading the team.. and my new boss isn't exactly what you call pleasant or friendly.. he got this temper that is worse than mine, serious biasness, unreasonable, childish and yes.. childish nature. very. no wonder i find his actions so familiar. he reminds me of a dozen sec school girls put together..

fatigue

Finally gotten into the rhythm of having deep sleep for ultimate rest and relaxation at night. I stumble into dreamland the moment my head hit the pillow and the only thing i look forward to each day is to snuggle into bed after a shower to recharge before the next day's to-dos..

Been suffering from the effects of the 3 main sources of discomfort- fatigue, exhaustion and tiredness. basically, they're the same thing so the effect is 3 times that of a single syndrome. and the fact that i face the com the entire day gives me dizzy spells with side-effects like blinking lights and colourful world so going home to face the com is a big NO-NO.

i'm so looking forward to the trip. Let's just hope we dont get stuck at the planning stage, which happens ever so often.

outliving them

I did better than expected for ops, acctg and econs; with unsolved problems, unbalanced financial statements and inaccurate graphs.. yet i aint feeling good.

Why is it so difficult to get an A?

----==========================------------------------=======================

Saw the pics.. Smokers go away..

I dont understand why they always use 'social' or 'can control' as excuses when in fact they shld've NOT smoke since they can 'control' in the first place..

and i cant fathom why they consider puffing a cool act... When it's so ghoulish in the first place.. With those smoke around you and you looking like your soul is detached from your body and your mind in control by some other..

Goodness gracious.. Looks are deceiving.. and the fact that i know these pple makes it even harder for me to accept the fact that they are doing such stuff when in fact if i can live on without those thrills in life, they shld be able to too..

Seriously, if it's like what they say, life is too short to give a miss at stuff; then i guess i just have to accept the fact that i'm going to outlive them..

Dead tired

----------------------------

was reading this lame book on how to ruin my life.. and it mentioned:

Dont let gratitude even enter your mind. The world hasnt completely bowed down before your perfection yet, and it's very far from being a perfect place, so what's there to be grateful for? If you start feeling gratitude- even in some small way- that means you're weak. so forget it.

so if that phrase holds, then it means that i'm a weak person. or not.

No conversation agenda.

Love it.

Been so long since i last chat on the phone.

Suffering from insomnia- look like a walking zombie, and my speech cant seem to coordinate with my mind.. i'm not saying what i'm thinking.. and this is getting worse..

I'm starting work on Monday so i have to find a way to sleep at 10 and wake up at 8 instead of sleep at 6 and wake up at 3 by tomorrow..

Think the Kukup trip is off unless we managed to find more pple to join.. But at least I have Tioman to look forward to.. Please dont let it be a talk-only plan coz I need to recharge..

TGIF

I just realized why I was that lucky yesterday..

TGIF

I got my license! YEAH!!!

YIPEE!!!! I PASS!!!! After six months of learning, I'm now able to sit behind the steering wheel and go where i like whenever i want! yeap. provided the car is available, which is practically impossible.

Went back to TP today.. coz it's CCN day! walked around biz, engine and design.. The usual booths selling drinks, candy floss, fondue, ice-cream, popcorn, brownies, muffins, manicure services, henna, and what not.. As usual, biz is the most happening place to be. lots of shouting, promoting, all those rah-rah.. lolx.. the good old times. i feel as young or even younger than those pple there today..

spent sometime walking around Engine school but couldnt find the new Saffron.. asked a couple of pple and they dunno either..like duh~

couldnt get my bro too.. so didnt get to see the NEW restaurant.. Saw Royston.. Btw, QY what course is Royston studying in TP???

it's amazing.. the place is still pretty much like what i rmbr it to be.. the same old banners.. posters all over for some voting thingy for union and of course promo ads for CCN.. lively bunch of pple so this trip back makes uni education seem so much more dull in contrast..

Alright.. time to drive tonight.. ^.^v

Page one

I edited the template to fit what i feel.

It's exactly what i think it is.
Everything reduced to a one liner.
Almost everything- since most of the important things in life is inexpressible anyway.

CAPS and exclamation marks becoming the tangibalisation tool!!!!! and paragraphs without full stops simply mean i'm too furious to even pause for a breather so i go on and on and rant and rave so as to deflate this inflated balloon of bad pent up emotions..

seriously, everything loses its impact when it is reduced to a one liner. but who cares?

Right now i need to feel good about myself so that i can perform tomorrow.
Cheers, to a better tomorrow and the best of luck to me.

GOOD LUCK!

brick boys

The brickboy series.. seriously, when does poly education includes such fun stuff? My fav is the Jay with fans brickboy, the lion king brickboy, superman brickboy, harry potter brickboy, long mao brickboy, and most of all, the garfield and pokey brickboys.. coz it's my sis's work!

Haven seen Viy and Cerrie in months.. yup.. my slacking khakis.. The Jups days and photo-taking in places with the best lightings.. wonder how they're doing.. Celi shld still be studying at SIM. V shld be still in the hospi industry, maybe as coordinator, or maybe she has a change of job.. i cant even rmbr how i got to know them.. izzit through F&B science where we sat at the last row with the locked room behind us? hmm..

then there's 11-of-us.. well, take away Nixon and add esther.. the ones i've been in contact with are PL, aining, Jo and Eve. haven met the rest in ages.. Hui should be with the love of her life- French, and maybe planning a trip to France in the near future.. HW maybe working temp at some F&B outlet for the holidays, Esther still at the hotel working OT everyday, Lisa applying and preparing for overseas study maybe, Tina surrounded by kids everyday, steph flying 100 miles away from home as the iconic SIA stewardess..

i missed the days in lec where Eve and Tina display their power of infectious laughter, bringing joy to yet another mundane day in school.. i missed going to the canteen and having to look for 3 tables coz there's simply too many of us to fit into one. i missed the wednesday visits to ITAS, the weekly exercise session during the last sem, the Mac snacks before heading home, KTV, Tina's sweets-pouch-passing-session in lecs, meetings at mushroom or biz entrance, the 72 ride and endless gossip about the same topic..

yeap. missed all that. even BIZ etiquette with formal wear.

The usual weekend get-together.. love it.

fell asleep resting on my grandpa's shoulder on the long ride home.. and it feels just like ytd.. the times when we take turns to sit on his lap and listen to stories.. or ask for a piggy back.. or bugging him to take us to the playground when all the other adults refused to. asking for sweets and ice-cream, begging him to take us to the arcade.. him bringing us out for great food and great fun.. especially the fake 20 cents rides with us singing our own songs.. i woke up when he reached my uncle's place and alighted. how he aged. his white hair, weak legs and failing eye sight.

i dunno if it's me. i wonder if it's because i only see him once in awhile that every time i see him he seems older, a lot more than the last time i saw him.

i guess i had always thought of them in the age range of 50+ instead of 70+.. in social work terms, they'd have been considered as the old-old. it never occurred to me that they're already in their 70s.. with their cheerful nature and loud voices that can be heard a corridor away.. and i hope the national statistics are wrong. i hope that the average age of males is NOT 75 and females 80. i hope not. coz it feels like there is not enough time for me to do whatever needs to be done.

Just for laughs =]

－CONTINUE...



and for those who'd been through or is going through tertiary education, you'll love this:



-lolx.. y cant they just leave the comments section blank if they have nth much to say? goodness.. i can imagine a balding lecturer in the LT showing that at the end of the semester @ the revision lec.. haha.. ENJOY

关心

那天写了篇和关心有关的entry。不久后就遇到和那天说的‘站在客观的角度’ 可能就是唯一能够真正关心他人的立场。这不是第一次。从前也有发生过类似的事。等到别人对你说出自己不曾知道或者自己根本不想承认的事时，静下心来好好思考到底应不应该相信他。也许那危言耸听会导致一份友谊的变质，但也许那能够让彼此更加珍惜和了解对方。所以我们是不是只该相信自己的眼睛，把所谓的谣言当屁？或者说我们应该听从旁观者的意见以及想法，好让我们以更客观的立场判断和决定接下来的行动？

还是我应该说只要听见的是‘好’ 事，那我就听。‘坏’ 事呢，我就当耳边疯？尤其主角如果是自己的好朋友，更难作出抉择－听：不相信朋友。不听：也许不能够在第一时间做出原本应该采取的举动，例如帮朋友解决问题。

就现在的我而言，我还是选择相信朋友。不是其他人的话不可靠。但我认为朋友毕竟是不会刻意隐瞒事情的真相，反而会选在最适当的时机让你知道。如真有意隐瞒，那也只是有更合理的解释。Maybe 因为距离和感情越好，越不能够开口。也许是想要避免不必要的冲突，让伤害减到最低。Or maybe 想把唯一能够支持自己的力量留到最后，当一切似乎忍无可忍，身体和心灵接近崩溃边缘时有个人能依靠。那个人，就是朋友。

是个很微妙的关系。一个能在全世界都遗忘你的时候，记住你的脸。一个能在所有人都抛弃你的时候伸出援手扶你一把。一个能在你开心时分享你的喜悦，伤心时分担你的忧愁的人。

友情，亲情，爱情：缺一不可。


而我仍然选择相信那位朋友有自己的苦衷和想法。
是的，对朋友而言，解释－－是多余的。

~walking in circles...

With the recent happenings, i wonder if level-loading is a thing of the past.
I'm glad it's the holidays.. yet i loathe this feeling of overindulgence in the seven deadly sins, especially sloth. as if it extends into infinity.

3 months later, will i be back at where i was? will it seem as if the 'reset' button was pressed and everything back at one? again?

Time flies. It's been 8 long years since the day she left. On Mothers' Day. Mothers' Day has always been one of my love-hate-occasions. Till now, i can still remember what happened that day, saying goodbye then leaving for my maternal grandparent's house for Mothers' Day celebration. Seeing mom's face after receiving the call, leaving in the middle of steamboat, sitting at the back of that red car on the left, looking out without a thought, seeing cars whizzed by and the lamp posts going past in a blur.. reaching the place. tears flow the minute my bag touches the floor. without even looking at her room.

sometimes i hope my memories can fail me.. but they seldom do.. i thought that after so long, stuff will sort of disappear and fade into nothingness. then it just take one spark to set the fire burning.. 8 years. has it really been so long? so long since i last celebrated Mothers' Day in tears?

yeap. move on. stop harping on stuff that i cant change.. i know.

then again, looking back is a way to determine how much we've moved on. isnt it so?

New chapter

yeap. new chapter. finally got down to changing a new blogskin. the old one was supposed to be a temporary solution but i turned out to be the most lasting one.. anyway, wanted to get a kiddish skin but couldnt find one that i like so ya.. found this.. if u have no idea, i'll intro myself again. i'm a 15-yr old kid studying in some high school off the main street in one of the more ulu parts of S'pore. to tell the truth, 15 is really damn old for that cute and childish blogskin but then again, i'm young AND young-er at heart.. so it doesnt seem to matter..

say cheers, for a better tomorrow.

hapi bdae cat

Happy meow meow birthday to cat! the oldest-youngest of us all.. hee



I'm glad we stayed up all night for a nice chat.
I'm glad i didnt succumb to the sleepy bug temptation.

The meet-old-pals-and-pals-of-old-pals gathering was great! Been so long since i last filled balloons with carbon dioxide.. lolx..


- cat getting married.. lolx.. ~

- the Swarovski necklace we bought and her mom put it on for her~


it's a first. really. to think that we know each other for years.. now we know stuff that we thought we knew. seriously, it's good to have more of such chit-chat sessions. or rather, connection sessions.. it's good to hear the truth from the person instead of a third-party. and i sincerely apologise should my actions or reactions made any of u gals unhappy.. and we hope u can take good care of yourself..

Feels like i'm going to one of the sleepover parties in high school, those late night girls talk.. goodness.. the good old days.. and i'm reliving the experience tonight (hopefully).

Not being in the same school makes it difficult to meet up with buddies.. pals u've known for years that u cant even remember how long exactly. is it 10? or 15?

fond memories.. being with them seems more like being with myself. connecting with a older me.. someone from the past.. no worries about having to think before i speak.. they've seen all you in all behaviour, maybe know you more than you do yourself that nothing matters actually.. they'll understand no matter what.. hee..

i missed chatting late at night about the insignificant stuffs as if they make a difference. i want to cook up sth in the middle of the night or grabbing a spoon and a tub of ice-cream sitting in front of the tv watching VCDs or reruns of yet another mediacorp shows..

so i'll definitely have a helluva good time tonight.. meeting old pals and pals of old pals.. feels great. that's one of the benefits of attending those sing-song-cut-cake-sessions..

ONE last paper. Tomorrow's paper marks the end of my semester year. then it's on to 3 months of holiday!

okay. and the first thing i need to do is to work. i seriously need a job.