I always thought that giving others freedom to do what they like is like empowerment. That way they'll grow the way they want, and become what they want to be. Then again, what happens to those who were given the chance yet made/ will make the wrong choice(s)? What if they're not meant to be given free reign of their life, what if it's not so much of a wise choice to tie them too tightly or give up on them? what if they are unable to withstand the consequences? then how would hey move on from that pitfall?

My cousin had an operation in NUH ytd. to remove his toe as a result of negligence due to diabetes. You know, i know too many people with that yucky liability that i find carbonated drinks yucky. i mean, not all carbonated gassy stuff. i still take some on occasions but i stay away from them most of the time, replacing that with tea.

my cousin is only 3 years older than me. he got that since primary 5 when the docs said he has had too much soft drinks and candies... imagine having to amputate one of your toes at the age of 24 because it's beyond hope. and tomorrow is his bdae.. what an unforgettable birthday gift to yourself.. i didnt get to see him. my mom did. so she told me that in order to let the flesh heal to a rounded stump, there's no stitches. so what's left between the other 4 toes is an empty space that's oozing blood..

my grandpa has diabetes too. but it's under control.. it pains me seeing him inject that into his body after meals.. he's a big strong guy but he told me that sometimes the pain is too much to bear. and he jokingly said that there's no space in his stomach that hasnt been pierced by the needle. For a man who lives to eat, this deficiency is evil. He still secretely takes his favourite pig trotters or durians once in awhile but has always been caught by my grandma. coz he'll fall ill soon after indulgence.. and his cough takes forever to recover.. it's like not able to wipe ur mouth clean no matter how hard you try after you sneak a snack. and it's liability for a lifetime.

i've learnt, at a tender age, that every choice i make has an impact in my life. in the quality of life. it doesnt take too much sickness to realise you have to love yourself, more than any other. i dont like smokers, coz i see the difficulty and struggles my paternal grandparents went through before they passed away. i see how a reflex like breathing becomes wheezing and panting just because when others have 2 lungs, you might be depending only on one. and you cant walk fast, cant exert strength, can even climb stairs. so all along, i've been striving towards a goal that can only be realised at the age of retirement. ageing graefully.. and before i achieve that, i need to lay the foundations in which to build my other goals on..

that's why i dont ever want anyone to fall into the same vicious cycle. you can learn to be responsible for your future happiness. you are given a choice. choose wisely. sometimes you reach dead end.. but make sure you turn back in time. do not embark on a road with no return..