am really glad that the weekends are here.. and that my fav season is approaching..

nightmares end this Dec

Pray that i wont ever get to see war on the land that i'm on. it's kinda sad listening to floating stories from my grandparents.. listening to how their lives changed coz of the war. knowing the pain and terror they face during good times.. that's why i've always been a little paranoid about enjoying the good things in life.. coz u wont ever know if it's just a smokescreen.

and money.. it's the root of all evil. and the reason why it's the root of all evil is beacause it's a good medium of exchange.. and the medium of exchange serves as a value in which pple use to go about their everyday lives.. that's why we cant help but want more of it.. that's why we cant get rid of it, ever.

it's the perfect game strategy ever created so that this game never ends.. and it never will, so long as this fundamental rule applies..

the humid weather is getting on my nerves.. i'm so looking forward to this rainy season.. partly so coz it'll ease the horrid size effects of the haze condition, but more so of the refreshing feel it brings.. and what is this grey-sky-no-rain thing that's been around for 2 days? felt as if everything has been repressed.. and somethings are going to explode soon.. it better not be me.

Okay. Take a deep breath.

Before i continue on my never ending econs preparation for tomorrow's meeting, i need to pray, for a miracle.

Firstly, all thanks to a groupmate, we're half done with the assignment. But then, i get more confused reading his answers though his 'answer sheet' seem to have the perfect solutions.. all coz of the complex equations..

this whole thing is slowing driving me nuts. but lucky i receive mails with content like:

[ we are already meeting on monday and that will be the main meeting.
technically u should be free coz u r in the same lec group as us!
so having something totally unmissable is not an excuse.]

[It is rather unfortunate that you misunderstood my good intentions for I merely suggested Tuesday as I figured it would suit everyone’s convenience better. However, since you insist on Monday, I shall oblige.

In the future, it would be much appreciated if you could perhaps use a more polite and respectful tone when mailing all of us.

Speaking of technicalities, when something is considered unmissable it is only logical to assume that it is in fact an excuse.

As for the rest, see you tmw.]

yeap. these brainy pple are funny.. serious.. proj work never get half as interesting as these useless crap.. they brighten up my day.. lolx..

spent yet another day slacking away. finished dou yu II (some old taiwan drama) within 2 days.. it's an achievement.. and i felt twice as guilty after watching the show coz i could've done so many other things that are on my priority list.. yeah.. opportunity cost i know..

but then...

i'm celebrating this festive season with the Hindus and Muslims counterparts. we're living in a cosmopolitan society.. so i shld learn to embrace other cultures.. and that is a damn good excuse for my total indulgence over the weekend..

cheers for a better tomorrow, coz i'm so not looking forward to tourism sociology meeting in the morning talking abt what i've researched and read up on.. coz i haven even touch a thing.. have to crap up something.. i pray for forgiveness for my laziness and for my little white lie tomorrow.. great.. and what abt trainings? haven been attending them for like 3 weeks? yeah.. proj workload and deadlines are just excuses.. so maybe i can pray for some commitment now that activities are no longer important? and i need more fuel.. for the passion. but first, i must find the spark. yeah. give me 2 stones.

now time for the only game that i'm constantly practising.. killing brain cells..

cheers, for a better tomorrow..

Yup. i'm oficially 20. It doesnt really make a lot of difference between 19 and 20 since it's all psychological. pple auto round it up. i've been saying i'm 20 since last year and i look like 23 anyway, so shld be grateful that i'm becoming younger each year.

struggling for 3 nights straight for the marketing individual proj.. i'm not a perfectionist but i do want to give my best.. this year, i wish for more contentment, and the ability to forgive the nitty gritties in life. unimportant things that shldnt take priority or cause any major disturbances in my life in the first place. things that shld take a backseat shld be in the boot.

Thanks to all who gave birthday greetings.. it's nice knowing pple remember my bdae, though friendster and birthdayalarm.com help a great deal in sending reminders.. lolx..

Jo's sms made me smile. guess the best gifts are those that make pple smile, regardless of the price value of the item.
she hopes that i'll meet prince today. well well.. first and foremost, how am i able to meet him when cinderella's already got him like 'a long long time ago?' and that even if he somehow starts travelling to my world now, he'll take 'a long long time' to reach my side. so this is impossible.. lolx.. and if he's gone, then cinderella = poor thing.

i'm indulging, soaking up the serenity that can only be experienced at this unearthly hour. taking time to sit ard and not do school work, feeling like the world owes me sth just for today.. and that this being my day is good enough an excuse for anything else i feel like putting aside..

aint in the reflective mood recently. maybe that's why i haven been able to improve, to march forward. i need time to connect with myself. guess that's the only disadvantage of being a Libra- the need to balance, precisely.. lolx..

Yup.. got this off some astrology webbie:

As much as you may not want to deal with the very things you absolutely must, the time has come. You can't postpone the inevitable any longer. You have had your time to rest and recuperate; now it is time to put the gears in motion. You are likely to get very emotional about your work today, so you might as well establish a good relationship with it instead of a negative one.

yeah.. i'm really working my ass off on that idiotic product life cycle.
the above sentence is a clear indication that i'm not postponing, definitely puting my gears in action and is very emotional!

okay. i know what i want for my birthday- compliments for the whole day.

kinda long since the last compliment.. cant even remember when.. it's the encore, encore feeling. gosh~ PJ must be crazy. well, i need to hear some nice things about me every now and then in order to stay happy and young.. so maybe it's time to get a bf? lolx..

somewhere is wired wrongly.. and i need to get away from marketing product life cycle. dun recall having to put in so much effort for a poly proj.. what did i get myself into this time? :(

went for a class gathering that i wasnt really invited to go by coincidence.
joined the gang but nv talk much.. the rest are pretty much the same after so long. realised how much i've aged, not them. our social circles never cross. even though we're in the same area, sitting at the same table, trying hard to make ourselves comfortable in each other's presence, i guess there's still no connection. it's kinda sad knowing that i spent 2 whole years of my life with a group of pple than i cant really find a common focal point with. i tried, so hard to find sth to talk about- school. but then again, like what they say, pls lor, talking abt school on a weekend. how nice! seriously speaking, other than that, and another common question 'do u have a bf now?', we have like not much common topics.

kinda pathetic how things turn out. but they wont die without having me as a friend since we have never been getting along fantastically... on the contrary, it's weird when we meet up suddenly and have to get use to that strange unfamiliar interpersonal relationship that plainly shows that u're trying too hard for sth that hasnt been achieved in the past and will never turn out well in the future (at least for this lifetime).

Glad that doesnt happen to everyone ard me. i'm pretty comfortable with meeting some friends that i haven been seeing in ages and picking the friendship where we left off knowing that certain things will never change and they're here to stay. what a nice phrase. here to stay. it's like living in a comfort zone knowing there are things that will keep u rooted. yes~ it's the anchored feeling we're attached to.

product life cycle. that damn marketing term.
this mere 15% is taking up so much more time than a 40% mid-term revision. then again, econs assignments still far surpass others in terms of minimal weightage but maximum time/energy contribution and this subject has 4 assignments in total, and 2 presentations. like wth.. and it's a group with 9 members. hohoho.. merry christmas!

Spoilt brat. Really am.

18th birthday i went on a cruise with my family and relatives.
19th birthday i got a purple gold ring from my mom.
20th birthday i got a hp laptop. (not even 20 yet! = )

Told my dad i want a supp card for my 21st birthday. lolx.. It's meant to be a joke but it doesnt really hurt to just pray hard.. ^.~

Guess there's pretty much nothing more in life than i can ask for. or rather, nothing much i want (now). Marketers always say that there is no end to wants, even the economists say so. Then again, there is no want if there is no desire AND liking is not equal to wanting. It's like saying 'the ocean is beautiful' when u have hydrophobia.

However, it's always nice to have pleasant surprises.. who doesnt? lolx.. It's like there is no dead weight loss in society plus the receiver benefits in the sense that he or she might not even be aware that he/she might enjoy the particular gift given, or that the gift is only accessible to the giver.

Wanted to buy myself something but couldnt find any. Gave up. shall just shop aimlessly and find sth that i happen to think i like and make do with it. Guess i'm still in what E.Erikson would say: 4th stage- identity vs identity confusion stage.

oh great. more abt marketing, econs & social work and my brain is certified fried.

Talking Cock in Parliament - Hossan Leong

in the mood to bring the archives in my previous blog back to life.
take a look will ya, if u have the time.
it's a record of my growth, (and confusion) for the past 2 years.
that was how i started out. and this is what i am.
It's as good, or even better, than looking at photo albums with fashion poses and fake smiles.

I can't believe my group is so damn lucky, again.
That slacker's club.

my day ended great. i skipped training.

sociology tut was full of question marks.. i dun really know what useful things i learnt when i came out of the class. the tutor seems to be able to see the subtle symbols/ meanings of sex in everthing he comes across in this subject. he got so excited talking about sec tourism, s'poreans going to Batam over the weekends, showing us how Korea's brochure portray their cultures and country, using pictures to entise pple (sex inocations of course). he can even relate airline advertisement - the stewardess as a sex object. it's just a stewardess in a business suit, with the tagline 'taking flight'. so he said it's supposed to be sth like 'taking off'. WTH! i dun find it any more amusing than he finds the ad. but after he mentioned it, it really is tat i'll never look at the same ad in the same way again.

and contiki holiday! he totally spoil my impression of contiki as the ideal tour agent for young adventurous adults. he brought in what he thinks the pamphlet is portraying- sex with multiple parters, not giving a care about who they are- since after the trip, you wont get to see each other again.and he mentioned 'it's so obvious since it's only for pple between the age of 18-35'. this kinda sux. the lesson is all about him giving his views, and his uncovering of such stuff in almost all materials.

and he told us 'i was ugly when i first came to s'pore. had a couple of gfs. one is a model for triumph.' and he went on to inform us that he still sees the ad his ex-gf is on all over s'pore though it was an ad about 7, 8 years ago. told us she was 23 when she took that ad. shld be about 30 now. the way he said it- like the model is an old hag now and shldnt be seen. the image of the huge word 'JERK' just drop from the ceiling and hovers over his head. think it's his evil grin and sheepish smile.

i'm kinda disappointed i got into his class. it's not so much of him spoiling my ideologies of tourism and hospitality..

but more of him spoiling the image/ impression and respect i have for all educators.