Every single avenue is dead, or as good as.
Facebook has already turned into Friendster II.
Email is a box for junks.
hp can be replaced by a good alarm clock.
But blog is still plays a part in enabling me to connect with myself, no matter how small the role has become.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
They enrolled me for a 2-day course about service excellence and I had so much fun recalling those stuff that I used to know and presume was rather good at.
The moments-of-truth, grooming, telephone etiquette and others.. Like so hospitality management. So the speaker was asking us to note down the way we address others over the phone and it dawned on me that ever since I joined operations, I have evolved into this rude performance-driven machine with the apparent lack of good service.
I remembered when I first started out over a year ago, I used to complete my sentences over the phone, give proper greetings, identify myself and my department as well as offer assistance.
Now i'm just this voice over at the other side of the line waiting to get through the tasks involved with the motivation to end the call ASAP. Like it's so much easier to just say "morning. Control."
It's sad, but it's the reality of life. Change is the only contact. We adapt accordingly to our environment. I suspect if i'm not such a good chameleon, i would have stabbed myself with a knife and bleed to death trying to fix the current practices/ processes to that of a different industry. Some things are best left alone.
and i was thinking that maybe that is why people in the service line puts in extra effort in serving others. For that is the only way to differentiate themselves from other industries. and it's sad that i'm in a results-oriented business where productivity counts even before the government announces the direction we should move towards. and i know the pain in accounting for every single action, or inaction that may or may not be under my control.
It makes my short stint in the hotel industry seemed so easy.
Ok. and i know that if all else fail, there is still the moolah to look forward to. and i have a good feeling about this year.
--------------------------------
A couple of stuff on my mind
- lasik or not?
- Turkey, Barcelona, Bulgaria, Egypt and Alaska
- Tod's bag
- korean food
- feeling secure
- new laptop
Action speaks louder than words. Get to understand body language better to know the reason(s) behind reactions.
Showing posts with label rat race. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rat race. Show all posts
September 18, 2010
May 03, 2010
It suddenly dawned on me that I have 2.25 more years to go to complete this journey of grit-my-teeth-and-rough-it-out period.
At work it's the usual challenge to try and meet things work. But many a time, it is the people that irks me endless, not the work. The people who by all means try to make work seem like you sway sway landed on the monopoly's Go-straight-to-jail-do-not-pass-Go-and-collect-$200 square. a one-way ticket straight to hell when you get burn nice and black. and seeing you squirm and wriggle make them feel good about themselves coz they right something in the world.
yep. those wayang kings and queens.
For one I know that I still like those boxes stacked neatly beside one another as much as a year ago and find the industry fascinating. But what goes on internally makes me sick. It's not really the office politics that is driving me crazy, but the lack of service to internal customers that makes me purple.
Maybe it is solely because I was from the hospitality industry that makes me feel this way, or that I do not yearn for a promotion to stoop as low to their level in the remaining time I have here.
I do look forward to completing whatever I have so that one day i can truly say that i am free. free of the clutches of this place that one has to tread so cautiously on soft ground, to move on to a place where people are generally 'more humane,' hopefully.
At work it's the usual challenge to try and meet things work. But many a time, it is the people that irks me endless, not the work. The people who by all means try to make work seem like you sway sway landed on the monopoly's Go-straight-to-jail-do-not-pass-Go-and-collect-$200 square. a one-way ticket straight to hell when you get burn nice and black. and seeing you squirm and wriggle make them feel good about themselves coz they right something in the world.
yep. those wayang kings and queens.
For one I know that I still like those boxes stacked neatly beside one another as much as a year ago and find the industry fascinating. But what goes on internally makes me sick. It's not really the office politics that is driving me crazy, but the lack of service to internal customers that makes me purple.
Maybe it is solely because I was from the hospitality industry that makes me feel this way, or that I do not yearn for a promotion to stoop as low to their level in the remaining time I have here.
I do look forward to completing whatever I have so that one day i can truly say that i am free. free of the clutches of this place that one has to tread so cautiously on soft ground, to move on to a place where people are generally 'more humane,' hopefully.
March 22, 2010
Today my colleagues were chatting on the way back from lunch and we talked about how one of our superiors, being the typical SINGLE male in his middle-late 30s. A little rounded in the middle, and slowly balding with an o-k-a-y career in an established organisation. Most probably has at least 4 out of the 5 Cs. So the question is: What are the types of females that will be attracted to him.
So that sparked off a little debate on the way females think.
so one of them was saying that unless the female is also in her 30s, the qn is out besides a partner of another nationality.
another was saying that there is a possibility since he is able to provide for whatever the partner desires.
so i was thinking. if the female has been single for awhile, working for say 5 years (still in her 20s), not as educated, and earning less than him, then it is possible.
For the world has changed. Women are as good as, if not better than men.
If my salary is comfortable enough for me to lead the kind of lifestyle that I want without a man (now), then why should I limit my options? if all else fail and nothing good goes to those who patiently wait then worse come to worse i'll fend for myself in the days to come. nothing to worry. if i earn more than a man, then i have one less thing to be afraid of.
so my colleague was saying that for females like me who just graduated, drawing a rather comfortable income, then the question is definitely out.
yep. believe in thyself, and believe in love. and since love is blind, then maybe nothing is impossible.
yep. so their next suggestion is: recruit more SINGLE females in the office.
but what they didnt know is that i have been discussing with my female colleagues and we think that is not the point. the entire place is filled with the opposite gender that doesnt attract us. so we sort of gave up on the makeup dress up for work and focus our energy on other things. no wonder i'm becoming more masculine these days. no wonder we are expected to have the meticulous nature of females in administrative tasks, and ALL the other positive aspects of males in other areas of work, like directing people and leading a team of much older men whose kids are older than us. like they say, the best of both worlds. but they forget the scales are skewed to one side, as usual.
So that sparked off a little debate on the way females think.
so one of them was saying that unless the female is also in her 30s, the qn is out besides a partner of another nationality.
another was saying that there is a possibility since he is able to provide for whatever the partner desires.
so i was thinking. if the female has been single for awhile, working for say 5 years (still in her 20s), not as educated, and earning less than him, then it is possible.
For the world has changed. Women are as good as, if not better than men.
If my salary is comfortable enough for me to lead the kind of lifestyle that I want without a man (now), then why should I limit my options? if all else fail and nothing good goes to those who patiently wait then worse come to worse i'll fend for myself in the days to come. nothing to worry. if i earn more than a man, then i have one less thing to be afraid of.
so my colleague was saying that for females like me who just graduated, drawing a rather comfortable income, then the question is definitely out.
yep. believe in thyself, and believe in love. and since love is blind, then maybe nothing is impossible.
yep. so their next suggestion is: recruit more SINGLE females in the office.
but what they didnt know is that i have been discussing with my female colleagues and we think that is not the point. the entire place is filled with the opposite gender that doesnt attract us. so we sort of gave up on the makeup dress up for work and focus our energy on other things. no wonder i'm becoming more masculine these days. no wonder we are expected to have the meticulous nature of females in administrative tasks, and ALL the other positive aspects of males in other areas of work, like directing people and leading a team of much older men whose kids are older than us. like they say, the best of both worlds. but they forget the scales are skewed to one side, as usual.
reborn from the ashes
Just when things start to go down the wrong way.
So the same goes for those situations that seem to run out of hand when things are looking bright.
yep. Strong believer of Murphy's law here.
Some days I just think I can't manage stress to the level that I think I could, for those pent-up emotions that are just waiting for the spark to begin a roaring fire wait peacefully under the surface with cracks.
and it doesnt help that i keep looking at the OTHER side of the coin, standing at the side where the grass is parched and in need of water.
Yes, there is a price to pay for the ka-ching that's dumped into the bank account at the end of the month.
and yes, welcome to the rat race.
Just when things start to go down the wrong way.
So the same goes for those situations that seem to run out of hand when things are looking bright.
yep. Strong believer of Murphy's law here.
Some days I just think I can't manage stress to the level that I think I could, for those pent-up emotions that are just waiting for the spark to begin a roaring fire wait peacefully under the surface with cracks.
and it doesnt help that i keep looking at the OTHER side of the coin, standing at the side where the grass is parched and in need of water.
Yes, there is a price to pay for the ka-ching that's dumped into the bank account at the end of the month.
and yes, welcome to the rat race.
November 18, 2009
I can feel it
Time for a wardrobe change. and I have no idea the difference that few kilos can make.
Shocked. Everytime I was alone in the office ladies spending the precious 5 minutes to myself and scare myself half to death with the notion that something aint right. or rather, seriously wrong. I put on a piece of pants today that used to be tight, and realised that I need a belt now. I no longer use the digital weighing scale underneath the dressing table for every bit lost cant be easily gained back. and it's kinda depressing. I'm maintaining my usual diet, and might even be consuming more tidbits with the frequent snacking. And not to mention the absence of any exercise in my day-to-day life. But somehow the metabolism still remains high and the energy intake doesnt seem to be enough. The guys in the office commented that I'm scary coz I eat a lot. Like a lot. Not normal for a female. Or maybe they just havent meet that many females in the office. And yes, my manager unofficially told me today that I've became a male in my line of work. Not because I want to. But because I have to. So the expectation is kinda like: u're a female so u're expected to have the usual blah blah qualities like being meticulous and stuff, yet able to act like I have the OTHER good qualities of a male. Anyway, my hormones are kinda screwed now with the irregular sleeping pattern so maybe I do have some of those traits. I think stress is playing a rather major role in my life now that I've started working and expecations are rising, if it aint high in the first place. Struggling to make things work, all the time. and explaining for every small details that may or may not be out of my control. and if it's not. why and what could be done. I was thinking today how it used to be like, say 15 years ago when the trade was booming (it's still booming) and haven been privatised, yet. I heard stories, wonderful ones, that I hope was still on but sadly not. Then again, when money gets in the way, everything gets OUT of the way.
So today I came back from a scoring day at work and realised that even with 2 hours of sleep I can jolly well function for more than 12 hours. and find myself amazed and wondering again how far one can go. Like where exactly is the limit. Like whether the same situation will happen like playing SIMS. fatigue sets in and one drops to the ground and catch some sleep then continue to wake up and go abt their activity.
so back to the scoring thing. My morale was on a uphill hike until those damn phone calls pushed me down the ladder. not once, not twice, but numerous time. If you do well, they want better. So ultimately I'm always racing against time, and trying to beat targets time and again. when you do extremely well in one area by sacrificing something else (one's always got to prioritise stuff), they expect u to maintain the one that u sacrificed AND also do well for the 1st priority. So the grey areas just gotten bigger. and things aint black and white anymore. not that they are in the first place. but the grey got diffused, if u know what i mean.
----------------------
Shocked. Everytime I was alone in the office ladies spending the precious 5 minutes to myself and scare myself half to death with the notion that something aint right. or rather, seriously wrong. I put on a piece of pants today that used to be tight, and realised that I need a belt now. I no longer use the digital weighing scale underneath the dressing table for every bit lost cant be easily gained back. and it's kinda depressing. I'm maintaining my usual diet, and might even be consuming more tidbits with the frequent snacking. And not to mention the absence of any exercise in my day-to-day life. But somehow the metabolism still remains high and the energy intake doesnt seem to be enough. The guys in the office commented that I'm scary coz I eat a lot. Like a lot. Not normal for a female. Or maybe they just havent meet that many females in the office. And yes, my manager unofficially told me today that I've became a male in my line of work. Not because I want to. But because I have to. So the expectation is kinda like: u're a female so u're expected to have the usual blah blah qualities like being meticulous and stuff, yet able to act like I have the OTHER good qualities of a male. Anyway, my hormones are kinda screwed now with the irregular sleeping pattern so maybe I do have some of those traits. I think stress is playing a rather major role in my life now that I've started working and expecations are rising, if it aint high in the first place. Struggling to make things work, all the time. and explaining for every small details that may or may not be out of my control. and if it's not. why and what could be done. I was thinking today how it used to be like, say 15 years ago when the trade was booming (it's still booming) and haven been privatised, yet. I heard stories, wonderful ones, that I hope was still on but sadly not. Then again, when money gets in the way, everything gets OUT of the way.
So today I came back from a scoring day at work and realised that even with 2 hours of sleep I can jolly well function for more than 12 hours. and find myself amazed and wondering again how far one can go. Like where exactly is the limit. Like whether the same situation will happen like playing SIMS. fatigue sets in and one drops to the ground and catch some sleep then continue to wake up and go abt their activity.
so back to the scoring thing. My morale was on a uphill hike until those damn phone calls pushed me down the ladder. not once, not twice, but numerous time. If you do well, they want better. So ultimately I'm always racing against time, and trying to beat targets time and again. when you do extremely well in one area by sacrificing something else (one's always got to prioritise stuff), they expect u to maintain the one that u sacrificed AND also do well for the 1st priority. So the grey areas just gotten bigger. and things aint black and white anymore. not that they are in the first place. but the grey got diffused, if u know what i mean.
----------------------
October 27, 2009
Stuff to fill
Paycheck is in, again. That makes me just 8/9 away from this journey.
If i keep this going, maybe I'll hit 39kg by Christmas.
Yep. tell me about going on a diet.
Expensive stuffs don't bother me. and i wonder why they don't. Shouldn't i just stand with the majority? Knowing i will not be happier in the long run with those purchases but decided to go ahead anyway. and what's life without splurging money on stuff that fulfill only wants in the short term esp since i'm earning my own keep.
i'm bothered. and think that sooner or later i'll get high blood pressure due to the stress level, and require money to see a psychiatrist. then again, who in this time and age aint bothered with money? Keep thinking that no matter how much i earn, it aint enough. some days I look back at my $1300/mth salary a couple of years ago and think how crazy i was to even think that that amount of money is enough for a living. Minus CPF and the monthly allowance for parents, there aint even enough for transportation and meals. then again, meals were provided back then.
then i look at myself now and think that at where i am now, it feels like not enough. not enough at all. not enough to do things that i want without considering for the future. and so i'm confused with the priority at the moment. keep thinking of wanting to grab more moolah before i cant do so. keep thinking of how great everything would be if one day i strike the lottery and can continue to work with minimum burden. yes, i feel like an old lady dying for a way out of her miserable life. and the funny thing about all this is, i'm having all that i wanted. a challenging job that pays relatively well, a cert that opens door and supportive love ones. yet the grass is still greener on the other side.
but as we all know, when one crosses the line, there's always another one out there.
so learn to be pessimistic. For there'll be less lines to cross.
If i keep this going, maybe I'll hit 39kg by Christmas.
Yep. tell me about going on a diet.
Expensive stuffs don't bother me. and i wonder why they don't. Shouldn't i just stand with the majority? Knowing i will not be happier in the long run with those purchases but decided to go ahead anyway. and what's life without splurging money on stuff that fulfill only wants in the short term esp since i'm earning my own keep.
i'm bothered. and think that sooner or later i'll get high blood pressure due to the stress level, and require money to see a psychiatrist. then again, who in this time and age aint bothered with money? Keep thinking that no matter how much i earn, it aint enough. some days I look back at my $1300/mth salary a couple of years ago and think how crazy i was to even think that that amount of money is enough for a living. Minus CPF and the monthly allowance for parents, there aint even enough for transportation and meals. then again, meals were provided back then.
then i look at myself now and think that at where i am now, it feels like not enough. not enough at all. not enough to do things that i want without considering for the future. and so i'm confused with the priority at the moment. keep thinking of wanting to grab more moolah before i cant do so. keep thinking of how great everything would be if one day i strike the lottery and can continue to work with minimum burden. yes, i feel like an old lady dying for a way out of her miserable life. and the funny thing about all this is, i'm having all that i wanted. a challenging job that pays relatively well, a cert that opens door and supportive love ones. yet the grass is still greener on the other side.
but as we all know, when one crosses the line, there's always another one out there.
so learn to be pessimistic. For there'll be less lines to cross.
September 17, 2009
Getting out of the matrix
Seems like everyone I know got something to say about their work life once they got out of the matrix into the circle of damned.
yep. out to the real world.
yep. out to the real world.
September 15, 2009
Something to look forward to?
Need those stuffs to keep me motivated.
Last time there used to be deadlines that I know I'll meet, signifying the end of a period and the start of a new one.
Like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Somehow this time round it seems like everything is clouded and haze is all over those stuffs.
Like the ticket to freedom costs much more than the pot of gold credited into an invisible source of moolah accumulation at the end of the month.
I thought I'll come to forget the feeling of being so tired, since the 17 odd hours i put in every other day in Tok. but life always find someway or another to make a joke out of you.
So here I am, zombie-like and trying to please myself more than anything in the world.
and looking for stuff to keep me sane. things that bring me away from the feeling of being suffocated.
Like searching for the feeling of going away like last year. Like having no responsibility and smiling like all the thousands of photos in the hard disk.
Like the need to go away after a period of work. Like planning for a trip that makes it possible for one to look forward to and count down to happy days.
Like feeling so lucky after work being doted on and cared for.
Like thanks. Thank You.
Last time there used to be deadlines that I know I'll meet, signifying the end of a period and the start of a new one.
Like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Somehow this time round it seems like everything is clouded and haze is all over those stuffs.
Like the ticket to freedom costs much more than the pot of gold credited into an invisible source of moolah accumulation at the end of the month.
I thought I'll come to forget the feeling of being so tired, since the 17 odd hours i put in every other day in Tok. but life always find someway or another to make a joke out of you.
So here I am, zombie-like and trying to please myself more than anything in the world.
and looking for stuff to keep me sane. things that bring me away from the feeling of being suffocated.
Like searching for the feeling of going away like last year. Like having no responsibility and smiling like all the thousands of photos in the hard disk.
Like the need to go away after a period of work. Like planning for a trip that makes it possible for one to look forward to and count down to happy days.
Like feeling so lucky after work being doted on and cared for.
Like thanks. Thank You.
July 06, 2009
Training phase
I know it is the right one when your mind doesn't work the way it used to work when you feel undervalued and unappreciated.
I know that if everything goes well, the pot of gold will be at the end of my rainbow for sure.
... And in the event that I screw up, the cause-and-effect theory ain't too hard to swallow either.
Plus performance to reward keeps the motivation going.. So I do not foresee how this will end up like the hospitality sector where one sits by thinking your department is the ONLY one bringing in the revenue..
Maybe I'm wrong. But let me be mistaken till 2012.
To the one staying above, THANKS.
------------------------------
Commencement this Sunday. I can hardly believe I've finished running around the track and have reached the finishing line. I have yet to feel the effect of stumbling head on into the rat race. Today I met a uni friend at Kovan MRT. She's currently hired at some investment banking company as an intern drawing an INTERN pay of $1500 per month. like WTF. seriously... all other interns earn like 700 bucks. those at auditing firms take 600. but well, that's where the money lies huh.. so I guess somehow I must tell myself that between money and passion, I CHOSE somewhere in between. Of course all must be aware that the scale is ALWAYS tipped to one end. ^.-
She posed the question: How does working full-time feels like?
Somehow I was truly lost for words. Somehow the situation has yet to hit full blast. I am still sort of strolling and admiring the flowers before someone throws a pail of dirty water at the walkway, and screams at me to get off their yard. yes. not that yet. Maybe that's why I can only properly evaluate the situation half a year from now, then a year from now, 2 years from now, and right after the bond. By then I should look like 30 with wrinkles and crowfeet. yep. Maybe.
Slowing down the ageing process. Maybe all we're seeking is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, regardless of one's wealth. All we're looking forward to is to be more stable, more secure, more dependable. yes, on ourselves. The HOPE for a BETTER tomorrow, no matter how contented we are. For if we can have more of one commodity, why would we want to settle for less? Yes, I'm starting to think that my mind works more like an economist than not.
For the many more 12-hr ++ shifts that I will be enduring for my coming days, wish me all the best.
thanks
I know that if everything goes well, the pot of gold will be at the end of my rainbow for sure.
... And in the event that I screw up, the cause-and-effect theory ain't too hard to swallow either.
Plus performance to reward keeps the motivation going.. So I do not foresee how this will end up like the hospitality sector where one sits by thinking your department is the ONLY one bringing in the revenue..
Maybe I'm wrong. But let me be mistaken till 2012.
To the one staying above, THANKS.
------------------------------
Commencement this Sunday. I can hardly believe I've finished running around the track and have reached the finishing line. I have yet to feel the effect of stumbling head on into the rat race. Today I met a uni friend at Kovan MRT. She's currently hired at some investment banking company as an intern drawing an INTERN pay of $1500 per month. like WTF. seriously... all other interns earn like 700 bucks. those at auditing firms take 600. but well, that's where the money lies huh.. so I guess somehow I must tell myself that between money and passion, I CHOSE somewhere in between. Of course all must be aware that the scale is ALWAYS tipped to one end. ^.-
She posed the question: How does working full-time feels like?
Somehow I was truly lost for words. Somehow the situation has yet to hit full blast. I am still sort of strolling and admiring the flowers before someone throws a pail of dirty water at the walkway, and screams at me to get off their yard. yes. not that yet. Maybe that's why I can only properly evaluate the situation half a year from now, then a year from now, 2 years from now, and right after the bond. By then I should look like 30 with wrinkles and crowfeet. yep. Maybe.
Slowing down the ageing process. Maybe all we're seeking is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, regardless of one's wealth. All we're looking forward to is to be more stable, more secure, more dependable. yes, on ourselves. The HOPE for a BETTER tomorrow, no matter how contented we are. For if we can have more of one commodity, why would we want to settle for less? Yes, I'm starting to think that my mind works more like an economist than not.
For the many more 12-hr ++ shifts that I will be enduring for my coming days, wish me all the best.
thanks
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